Simple words can heal years of doubt

 I had the most positive interaction with a sweet lady

at the dairy yesterday .

We bonded over our Jeeps and our mutual love for dairy barn cat who just had

kittens. A simple conversation turned to faith...as they do sometimes.

As we spoke, I could not stop thinking about how just plain pleasant 

she was, this woman who I just met.

It was like a refreshing breeze, truly.

There was no walking on eggshells, no dancing around topics...

Just two ladies chatting in the sunshine outside a dairy.

In that moment I thought, * this is the kind of relationship

I need in my life* 

More of this please....

It was a simple moment yet very profound.

In an era where we are judged by family, friends, people

on the internet, at a time we all try and not offend people

( because , shocker...most people do not try to offend people)

the ease of which this conversation took place reminded me 

that it was once always like this.

It was not always this minefield of what is *correct* or

what is the latest trending verbiage to use to not sound like the

monsters others wish to paint you as.

That very thing has been the crux of my underlying I dare say

unhappiness for a while now.

As people walk through their lives now, they carry a bag of issues 

on their backs. If you are too positive in their eyes, you are an issue,

if you do not grab it and hold it for them, you are an issue ...

if your natural inclinations are to try and focus upon

how to help them drop the bag, they get angry.

It is a lose lose all around which causes massive frustrations.

It has been a confusing time for me.

I stopped holding others bags, stopped listening to the complaining

of those who will not drop the bag despite years of  torment.

I got burned out and lost faith in relationships that were

one way.

Those complex relationships created in the past 

are not real. I have always been a person who accepted people

where they stood. Fine. That is you and God bless you.

You life is your life.

However,

The vitriol I have had thrown my way from friends and family

the past few years  is a symptom of a larger issue.

I have been torn apart for being too positive.

Relationships are not supposed to tear you apart inside.

The lack of discernment on others parts is just one issue,

the other is the global use of terms & trends and  words to

manipulate and punish people we do not agree with.

The viral TikTok video of the person slamming their

well meaning parents for everything that ever happened to them.

The people who can not stop obsessing over who they hate

and if you do not placate them they turn their vitriol on you.

All are signs we as a people are not emotionally healthy.

*****

This moment in my day ( 20 minutes actually) gave me hope.

It had me thinking that perhaps there are others out there

who may truly be calm, kind and grace filled , who have 

not caved to the histrionics plaguing todays society.

I am up at 2 am writing this because I was so affected by it.

Imagine, a simple normal conversation having that impact upon me.

As someone who is a professional interactive performer , a person who 

tries to bring light and grace into others lives, I was floored

by how easy this was. No contrived words, no sidestepping hard topics.

It was refreshing, it was a new lesson and it will change

how I move forward in life.

Just because you may be surrounded in your work or home life

with people who do not support your light, it does not mean

it is gone forever. God will place an unsuspecting person in your life

who will change your mind.

I came home and started to go through my socials.

I started favouring people and pages I believe to be positive influences

in my news feed.

 ( last week I actually removed them from my phone

for a week- I was getting so burned out) .

My new friend also suggested some positive groups she is

a part of and I joined them.

After we said our goodbyes

( I will be seeing her every week now for the summer months)

I went to the next farm filled with such promise and good feelings.

But when I expected the light to just grow, I instead

was met with a burnt out farmer dumping their negative energies

on me. I instantly could feel the heaviness return that I have been

fighting for years. As I returned to my car I had the overwhelming urge to 

move along.... let that go.

Some of us are just so sensitive to others energies that we can

get into a sort of gloomy mood and not even know it.

We hide our positivity because we were told it is offensive.

We hide it other times because others think it is weakness.

We have been burned by relationships that have ended

not because of any one conversation but because 

we simply cared for people more than they cared for us.

That is okay.

What I learned in the dairy parking lot with my favorite

barn kitty running between our legs is how rare real

connection is. 

The world is so fake right now.

Why wouldn't that also extend to relationships?

That is my simple story for how I  learned that 

the energy I put out  will attract the energy I

get from others. I have the accepting others thing down

I just needed to realise that can also be extended to myself.

Sometimes people just make you feel like a better version of yourself.

They hold up a mirror, letting you see the best parts of you.

I choose to believe these folks are divinely sent.

Stop focusing on those who are irritated by your existence .

Move towards the light & the light filled souls.

Those are your people.

💗

Raven

xoxo

🐦‍⬛